I'm currently spending summer vacation at my moms place with erkimys!
It's been terribly exhausting for me for the last few weeks for some reason, I've been depressed and anxious and I can't seem to find a reason for it so I'm really lost..in addition to that, I've found myself in an art block again. I'm not confident in my art, at all. To be honest with you, I absolutely despise my art.
I would love to be able to draw daily, but I just can't. I am desperate to get better and develop my own style and IMPROVE in general, but you can't do that without daily drawing, practising, taking on new things and methods etc. and I don't seem to have the motivation to do so. It makes me sad, and it makes me cry whenever I think about it.
I'd love to make my own species. Take commissions, art trades and kiribans. Draw art for others. Draw for myself. But I can't, and that makes me cry.
Because of that, I might just..quit drawing. Completely. I still have a few commissions to be done for RRRAI, Ethandee and Girryy but after I'm done with those, I might just quit the whole drawing thing all together and not draw at all.
That should be really easy for me because I never pick up a pen just for fun. I never think that "Hey I don't have anything to do, I could draw!" or "I have this great idea for a character/species in my head, I need to draw it". I never think about drawing, and that makes me feel that I really should just quit the whole thing..
What makes it even more easy for me is that I have only 147 watchers, I am barely out here, nobody would care if I left completely! It's almost the same as now, I post next to no art and when I do, I get nothing.
We'll see. I'll finish the commissions once I can, but those will be done eventually. I would never take money and not do my job.